Shooting Stars


Photo by Austin Schmid on Unsplash


So briefly we shine

streaking through this life

bright lights

here and gone

Rushing into and out of

lives of others

some see us

some do not

For some our light

lives on

in their hearts

pieces of our matter remains

For others

they never know

that we were even

here

Each of us

bright shining stars

burning hot moving fast

beautiful

Land Of The Lost


The older I get, the more people I lose from my life. A natural occurrence of aging because everyone around you is older too. Still, sadness and grief remain an ever returning constant.

Last night, my uncle Robert passed away unexpectedly. He was in his early 70s, only a little more than 20 years older than me. It was shocking and sad to get the news this morning from my father, who will turn 79 on Monday. Each passing reminds me more that others in my life will also be leaving soon…..and sooner than I would wish.

My uncle Robert was a giant of a man. I remember him from a very young age being larger than life and quieter than snow. He did not have a lot to say usually, but when he did it was either very important that you listen or very funny. He had an amazing sense of humor and a heart as big as giants. Always there to lend a helping hand no matter what someone needed. And he never, ever failed to make me laugh.

My heart aches for his family today. He was married to my aunt, my father’s sister, for 56 years with two wonderful children, my cousins. Along with many grandchildren. A man of quiet faith and steadfast love and support.

I am sad about his passing, very sad. But I think that his passing has brought once again to light the fact that others in my life will also pass from this life and some sooner than others. It is the way of things, the circle of life, but it does not make it any easier to wade through the ocean waves of grief. From my childhood, only a handful of the “older” generation now remain. Soon, I will be the older generation, or part of what is left of it.

The others will pass into the next life, but they do not pass from memory or from the heart.

I have a wonderful family of my own and I am so grateful for each day with them. But those I have lost are still part of my thoughts, my memories, my heart. And I navigate the ocean of grief some days with no waves and some days with many as I celebrate the present and the living while missing those who have been lost.

Pressure


water

 

It bears down on me

like so much pressure

pushing, ever pushing

never letting up.

 

School, work, family

always something to do

never any rest or peace

even in my dreams.

 

Overwhelming pressure

leaving dents

in my mind, my heart, my soul

getting deeper all the time.

 

Smothering, getting sick

no strength to push back

going under

and no one sees.

Life



Horribly beautiful
in all it’s glory
inspiration one moment
desperation the next
painted with
telling brush strokes
the truth never
quite revealed
horribly beautiful
this thing called life

Now



Past is gone
future not yet here
there is only
now

Memories no regrets
over what was
now is all
we have

Tomorrow awaits
but is not
reside only in
the now

This moment
nothing more
live in this
now

Shake off
the past
do not worry
for the future

Now today
this instant
now is all the
time we have

Slipping


slippingEverything is always slipping
slowly quickly like vapors of life
people who slip in and out
hours that slip slow and fast

Children that grow into men
time has no meaning
it’s just a human measure
because everything is still slipping

In constant motion our lives
always moving forward
everything slipping
while we stand and watch

To remember that we die only once
yet live every day
do so before all we know
is slipping away

Walk


So easy it is to quickly judge
the ones we do not know
to assume too much about their lives
thinking we know all about them

Walk for just one minute in their shoes
see life as they do in just one step
before you decide who they are
and what they think and feel

Their hardships may not be what is visible
the minute by minute trials they face
while we presume to know the truth
living the truth is another story

Walk for a moment in their lives
become what they must endure
live as they do each day
for just one moment in time

Maze


Through this maze of darkened struggle
at times lost and still others found
the walk long the truth is not easy
just trying to get up off the ground

Nagging at the corners never quiet
the past it whispers you are there
inside it we try to find the way
afraid to share

We try to run it winds ever still
this heart maze ever changing never finished
all that come in truly never leave
the pieces found along the way

Struggle against the infinity
where is the place without whispers
the twists and turns and on it goes
slaves we have become continuing to walk

Promise


There is no promise of tomorrow
no guarantee of another day
nothing to assure a life lived longer
no promise one can have

Yesterday is gone past now dead
those things mean nothing now
forgotten pains worthless hurts
now past away into shadow

Tomorrow not promised not even here
no need to worry or to fret
nothing one can do about what is not here yet
something that is only a possibility

There is only today only this moment
everything else means little
one promise only to live in this day
for it is all we truly have

Journey


The steps at first small and unsure

and all at once it becomes a blur

loving living sharing your soul

giving taking losing control

Each step on the journey more of the heart

loving together tearing apart

the push the pull always in motion

following the road whatever the notion

It is not the destination or the end

but to our hearts the journey does lend

growing losing becoming ever more

no step that comes like the ones before

The journey teaches reaches breaks molds

never knowing what the future holds

never regret remember always seeking what is true

this journey called life for me and you

© Deborah Horton Writing

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