Deborah Horton Writing

Encouragement meaning to give support, confidence or hope to someone

every step was difficult and needed great sacrifice

many never will never know the exact cost

few understood fewer still shared words of encouragement

many were jealous more were oblivious most were too self-absorbed

but the fewer had words of support to hold me up

belief in me to give me confidence when I was lost

and love to replenish my hope when I had none for myself

the very small circle in which my truest friends are held

like a necklace of encouragement it surrounds me daily

sparkling jewels of support – confidence – hope

shining through even my darkest day

and I continue to walk the now lighted path

Like tendrils of wispy smoke creeping in through small cracks in the walls

seeping in spreading out until I am filled like water into a glass

starting small just a single thought that grows bigger as I feed it

ever hungry it keeps asking for more and slowly I am surrounded

curling around my every waking moment I begin to question everything

as it consumes me I become lost and all I have accomplished means nothing

I hear the whispers at first only a word here or there

but then a nonstop sound that drowns out anything positive

faith becomes something lost

belief a word I am unfamiliar with

trust for the process impossible to find

trapped in this box filled with only doubt

continuing to search for the way out

My true first sign of Spring every year delicate and light

reaching out for the sun so bright

marking the start of everything new

at first they are just a few

then slowly more and more of the purple flowers

fill my days with beautiful hours

drinking them in like pressed new wine

delighting the senses both yours and mine

like the lightest grapes they smell

growing where snow just recently fell

the first to appear after winter’s long sleep

an appointment with Spring they must keep

Only a short time the purple to share

every year they greet me just there

Enjoy them while I may

though they be beautiful they cannot stay

Some stay in a place where their comfort is never disturbed

where chances and choices are not something to be taken or made

where the status quo is good enough

where obstacles and disappointments are never overcome

where stepping outside their reality is a foreign thought

where growing beyond what they are never enters their mind

where believing learning is a lifelong adventure is unacceptable

where working for something you have dreamed of sounds just too hard

where nothing surprising or miraculous ever happens

where the only words they ever utter are

I…..could……never…..

There are others who live in a place where their comfort is always disturbed

where chances and choices are taken and made voraciously

where the status quo is considered weak

where obstacles and disappointments are just things to be conquered

where stepping outside their reality is like breathing

where growing beyond what they are is their only thought

where learning is as important to them as food

where working for something they have dreamed of is all they do

where everything is a surprise and miracles are everywhere

where the only words they utter are

Never….say…..never

It changes nothing

increases stress

loses sleep

brings illness

changes moods

intrudes on thoughts

affects work

harms relationships

causes anger

manifests doubt

decreases confidence

it changes nothing

close your eyes

let it be washed away

Seconds tick on like a metronome of life

Whispering that there is less and less left of it

Here am I waiting waiting waiting

Striving to reach one goal then another then the next

When will this work bear fruit

Or am I missing the fruit already born

The lives already touched

Do I only see the forest

And have no sight of the trees

Listening to the tick of the clock

I learn to live in the seconds

Becoming

Ever changing

Fluid

Here am I

And yet always moving

Growing

Exploring

Absorbing

Expanding

Always on a journey

Becoming

Difficult, sometimes impossible, but the opportunity is in the doing

learning about oneself through forgiveness of others

walking through the wrongs the pain the hurt towards reconciliation

though it may not be possible to always achieve with others

achieving it inside your own heart and soul opens pathways to freedom

impossible though it is to fix others you are responsible for your own healing

make amends say what is necessary offer forgiveness and accept what comes

receive reconciliation either with another or within oneself

each leads to the path of personal peace

Marcus Tullius Cicero once said it is the peculiar quality of a fool to perceive the faults of others and to forget his own

As ever they see but do not comprehend

Much easier it is to put the blame on others than to take on responsibility

Fools are well known for having to say something, anything, constantly

The art of distraction from their own mistakes pointing to any other direction is perfected daily

Fools sound wise, often sounding all knowing, and they are usually wrapped in an eye and sensory pleasing package

Their words are like honey dripped diamonds beautiful to see and hear but they seep into every corner sticking, blocking the truth

And blindly the masses follow without question or conviction mesmerized by the sounds of tinkling brass or sounding cymbals

In the end, we are all made fools

So then who is more foolish, the fool, or the fool who follows him?